Friday, December 28, 2007

God Commanded Thee


Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whither soever thougoest. Jos 1:9

Honour is here as it put upon Joshua,

nd great power lodged in his hand, by him that is the fountain of honour and power, and by whom kings reign. Instructions are given him by Infinite Wisdom, and encouragements by the God of all consolation. God had before spoken to Moses concerning him (Num_27:18), but now he speaks to him (v. 1), probably as he spoke to Moses (Lev_1:1) out of the tabernacle of the congregation, where Joshua had with Moses presented himself (Deu_31:14), to learn the way of attending there. Though Eleazar had the breast-plate of judgment, which Joshua was directed to consult as there was occasion (Num_27:21), yet, for his greater encouragement, God here speaks to him immediately, some think in a dream or vision (as Job_33:15); for though God has tied us to instituted ordinances, in them to attend him, yet he has not tied himself to them, but that he may without them make himself known to his people, and speak to their hearts otherwise than by their ears. Concerning Joshua's call to the government observe here,


I. The time when it was given him: After the death of Moses. As soon as ever Moses was dead, Joshua took upon him the administration, by virtue of his solemn ordination in Moses's life-time. An interregnum, though but for a few days, might have been of bad consequence; but it is probable that God did not speak to him to go forward towards Canaan till after the thirty days of mourning for Moses were ended; not, as the Jews say, because the sadness of his spirit during those days unfitted him for communion with God (he sorrowed not as one that had no hope), but by this solemn pause, and a month's adjournment of the public councils, even now when time was so very precious to them, God would put an honour upon the memory of Moses, and give time to the people not only to lament their loss of him, but to repent of their miscarriages towards him during the forty years of his government.


II. The place Joshua had been in before he was thus preferred. He was Moses's minister, that is, an immediate attendant upon his person and assistant in business. The Septuagint translates it hupourgos, a workman under Moses, under his direction and command. Observe, 1. He that was here called to honour had been long bred to business. Our Lord Jesus himself took upon him the form of a servant, and then God highly exalted him. 2. He was trained up in subjection and under command. Those are fittest to rule that have learnt to obey. 3. He that was to succeed Moses was intimately acquainted with him, that he might fully know his doctrine and manner of life, his purpose and long-suffering (2Ti_3:10), might take the same measures, walk in the same spirit, in the same steps, having to carry on the same work. 4. He was herein a type of Christ, who might therefore be called Moses's minister, because he was made under the law and fulfilled all the righteousness of it.


III. The call itself that God gave him, which is very full.


1. The consideration upon which he was called to the government: Moses my servant is dead, v. 2. All good men are God's servants; and it is no disparagement, but an honour, to the greatest of men to be so: angels themselves are his ministers. Moses was called to extraordinary work, was a steward in God's house, and in the discharge of the trusts reposed in him he served not himself but God who employed him; he was faithful as a servant, and with an eye to the Son, as is intimated, Heb_3:5, where what he did is said to be for a testimony of the things that should be spoken after. God will own his servants, will confess them in the great day. But Moses, though God's servant, and one that could ill be spared, is dead; for God will change hands, to show that whatever instruments he uses he is not tied to any. Moses, when he has done his work as a servant, dies and goes to rest from his labours, and enters into the joy of his Lord. Observe, God takes notice of the death of his servants. It is precious in his sight, Psa_116:15.


2. The call itself. Now therefore arise. (1.) "Though Moses is dead, the work must go on; therefore arise, and go about it." Let not weeping hinder sowing, nor the withering of the most useful hands be the weakening of ours; for, when God has work to do, he will either find or make instruments fit to carry it on. Moses the servant is dead, but God the Master is not: he lives for ever. (2.) "Because Moses is dead, therefore the work devolves upon thee as his successor, for hereunto thou wast appointed. Therefore there is need of thee to fill up his place; up, and be doing." Note, [1.] The removal of useful men should quicken survivors to be so much the more diligent in doing good. Such and such are dead, and we must die shortly, therefore let us work while it is day. [2.] It is a great mercy to a people, if, when useful men are taken away in the midst of their usefulness, others are raised up in their stead to go on where they broke off. Joshua must arise to finish what Moses began. Thus the latter generations enter into the labours of the former. And thus Christ, our Joshua, does that for us which could never be done by the law of Moses, - justifies (Act_13:39), and sanctifies, Rom_8:3. The life of Moses made way for Joshua, and prepared the people for what was to be done by him. Thus the law is a schoolmaster to bring us to Christ: and then the death of Moses made room for Joshua; thus we are dead to the law, our first husband, that we may be married to Christ, Rom_7:4.


3. The particular service he was now called out to: "Arise, go over this Jordan, this river which you have in view, and on the banks of which you lie encamped." This was a trial to the faith of Joshua, whether he would give orders to make preparation for passing the river when there was no visible way of getting over it, at least not at this place and at this time, when all the banks were overflown, Jos_3:15. He had no pontoons or bridge of boats by which to convey them over, and yet he must believe that God, who had ordered them over, would open a way for them. Going over Jordan was going into Canaan; thither Moses might not, could not, bring them, Deu_31:2. Thus the honour of bringing the many sons to glory is reserved for Christ the captain of our salvation, Heb_2:10.


4. The grant of the land of Canaan to the children of Israel is here repeated (Jos_1:2-4): I do give it them. To the patriarchs it was promised, I will give it; but, now that the fourth generation had expired, the iniquity of the Amorites was full, and the time had come for the performance of the promise, it is actually conveyed, and they are put in possession of that which they had long been in expectation of: "I do give it, enter upon it, it is all your own; nay (Jos_1:3), I have given it; though it be yet unconquered, it is as sure to you as if it were in your hands." Observe, (1.) The persons to whom the conveyance is made: To them, even to the children of Israel (Jos_1:2), because they are the seed of Jacob, who was called Israel at the time when this promise was made to him, Gen_35:10, Gen_35:12. The children of Israel, though they had been very provoking in the wilderness, yet, for their fathers' sakes, should have the entail preserved. And it was the children of the murmurers that God said should enter Canaan, Num_14:31. (2.) The land itself that is conveyed: From the river Euphrates eastward, to the Mediterranean Sea westward, Jos_1:4. Though their sin cut them short of this large possession, and they never replenished all the country within the bounds here mentioned, yet, had they been obedient, God would have given them this and much more. Out of all these countries, and many others, there were in process of time proselytes to the Jewish religion, as appears, Act_2:5, etc. If their church was enlarged, though their nation was not multiplied, it cannot be said that the promise was of no effect. And, if this promise had not its full accomplishment in the letter, believers might thence infer that it had a further meaning, and was to be fulfilled in the kingdom of the Messiah, both that of grace and that of glory. (3.) The condition is here implied upon which this grant is made, in those words, as I said unto Moses, that is, "upon the terms that Moses told you of many a time, if you will keep my statutes, you shall go in and possess that good land. Take it under those provisos and limitations, and not otherwise." The precept and promise must not be separated. (4.) It is intimated with what ease they should gain the possession of this land, if it were not their own fault, in these words, "Every place that the sole of your foot shall tread upon (within the following bounds) shall be your own. Do but set your foot upon it and you have it."


5. The promises God here makes to Joshua for his encouragement. (1.) That he should be sure of the presence of God with him in this great work to which he was called (Jos_1:5): "As I was with Moses, to direct and strengthen him, to own and prosper him, and give him success in bringing Israel out of Egypt and leading them through the wilderness, so I will be with thee to enable thee to settle them in Canaan." Joshua was sensible how far he came short of Moses in wisdom and grace; But what Moses did was done by virtue of the presence of God with him, and, though Joshua had not always the same presence of mind that Moses had, yet, if he had always the same presence of God, he would do well enough. Note, it is a great comfort to the rising generation of ministers and Christians that the same grace which was sufficient for those that went before them shall not be wanting to them if they be not wanting to themselves in the improvement of it. It is repeated here again (v. 9). "The Lord thy God is with thee as a God of power, and that power engaged for thee whithersoever thou goest." Note, Those that go where God sends them shall have him with them wherever they go and they need desire no more to make them easy and prosperous. (2.) That the presence of God should never be withdrawn from him: I will not fail thee, nor forsake thee, v. 5. Moses had assured him of this (Deu_31:8), that, though he must now leave him, God never would: and here God himself confirms that word of his servant Moses (Isa_44:26), and engages never to leave Joshua. We need the presence of God, not only when we are beginning our work to set us in, but in the progress of it to further us with a continual help. If that at any time fail us, we are gone; this we may be sure, that the Lord is with us while we are with him. This promise here made to Joshua is applied to all believers, and improved as an argument against covetousness, Heb_13:5, Be content with such things as you have, for he hath said, I will never leave thee. (3.) That he should have victory over all the enemies of Israel (Jos_1:5): There shall not any man that comes against thee be able to stand before thee. Note, There is no standing before those that have God on their side. If he be for us, who can be against us? God promises him clear success - the enemy should not make any head against him; and constant success - all the days of his life. However it might be with Israel when he was gone, all his reign should be graced with triumphs. What Joshua had himself encouraged the people with long ago (Num_14:9) God here encourages him with. (4.) That he should himself have the dividing of this land among the people of Israel, v. 6. It was a great encouragement to him in beginning this work that he was sure to see it finished and his labour should not be in vain. Some make it a reason why he should arm himself with resolution, and be of good courage, because of the bad character of the people whom he must cause to inherit that land. He knew well what a froward discontented people they were, and how unmanageable they had been in his predecessor's time; let him therefore expect vexation from them and be of good courage.


6. The charge or command he gives to Joshua, which is,


(1.) That he conform himself in every thing to the law of God, and make this his rule v. 7, 8. God does, as it were, put the book of the law into Joshua's hand; as, when Joash was crowned, they gave him the testimony, 2Ki_11:12. And concerning this book he is charged, [1.] To meditate therein day and night, that he might understand it and have it ready in him upon all occasions. If ever any man's business might have excused him from meditation, and other acts of devotion, one would think Joshua's might at this time. It was a great trust that was lodged in his hands; the care of it was enough to fill him, if he had had ten souls, and yet he must find time and thoughts for meditation. Whatever affairs of this world we have to mind, we must not neglect the one thing needful. [5.] Not to let it depart out of his mouth; that is, all his orders to the people, and his judgments upon appeals made to him, must be consonant to the law of God; upon all occasions he must speak according to this rule, Isa_8:20. Joshua was to maintain and carry on the work that Moses had begun, and therefore he must not only complete the salvation Moses had wrought for them, but must uphold the holy religion he had established among them. There was no occasion to make new laws; but that good thing which was committed to him he must carefully and faithfully keep, 2Ti_1:14. [3.] He must observe to do according to all this law. To this end he must meditate therein, not for contemplation sake only, or to fill his head with notions, or that he might find something to puzzle the priests with, but that he might, both as a man and as a magistrate, observe to do according to what was written therein; and several things were written there which had particular reference to the business he had now before him, as the laws concerning their wars, the destroying of the Canaanites and the dividing of Canaan; etc.; these he must religiously observe. Joshua was a man of great power and authority, yet he must himself be under command and do as he is bidden. No man's dignity or dominion, how great soever, sets him above the law of God. Joshua must not only govern by law, and take care that the people observed the law, but he must observe it himself, and so by his own example maintain the honour and power of it. First, He must do what was written. It is not enough to hear and read the word, to commend and admire it, to know and remember it, to talk and discourse of it, but we must do it. Secondly, He must do according to what was written, exactly observing the law as his copy, and doing, not only that which was there required, but in all circumstances according to the appointment. Thirdly, He must do according to all that was written, without exception or reserve, having a respect to all God's commandments, even those which are most displeasing to flesh and blood. Fourthly, He must observe to do so, observe the checks of conscience, the hints of providence; and all the advantages of opportunity. Careful observance is necessary to universal obedience. Fifthly, He must not turn from it, either in his own practice or in any act of government, to the right hand or to the left, for there are errors on both hands, and virtue is in the mean. Sixthly, He must be strong and courageous, that he might do according to the law. So many discouragements there are in the way of duty that those who will proceed and persevere in it must put on resolution. And, lastly, to encourage him in his obedience, he assures him that then he shall do wisely (as it is in the margin) and make his way prosperous, Jos_1:7, Jos_1:8. Those that make the word of God their rule, and conscientiously walk by that rule, shall both do well and speed well; it will furnish them with the best maxims by which to order their conversation (Psa_111:10); and it will entitle them to the best blessings: God shall give them the desire of their heart.


(2.) That he encourage himself herein with the promise and presence of God, and make these his stay (Jos_1:6): Be strong and of a good courage. And again (Jos_1:7), as if this was the one thing needful: Only be strong and very courageous. And he concludes with this (Jos_1:9): Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed. Joshua had long since signalized his valour, in the war with Amalek, and in his dissent from the report of the evil spies; and yet God sees fit thus to inculcate this precept upon him. Those that have grace have need to be called upon again and again to exercise grace and to improve in it. Joshua was humble and low in his own eyes, not distrustful of God, and his power, and promise, but diffident of himself, and of his own wisdom, and strength, and sufficiency for the work, especially coming after so great a man as Moses; and therefore God repeats this so often, "Be strong and of a good courage; let not the sense of thy own infirmities dishearten thee; God is all-sufficient. Have not I commanded thee?" [1.] "I have commanded the work to be done, and therefore it shall be done, how invincible soever the difficulties may seem that lie in the way." Nay, [2.] "I have commanded, called, and commissioned, thee to do it, and therefore will be sure to own thee, and strengthen thee, and bear thee out in. it." Note, When we are in the way of our duty we have reason to be strong and very courageous; and it will help very much to animate and embolden us if we keep our eye upon the divine warrant, hear God saying, "Have not I commanded thee? I will therefore help thee, succeed thee, accept thee, reward thee." Our Lord Jesus, as Joshua here, was borne up under his sufferings by a regard to the will of God and the commandment he had received from his Father, Joh_10:18.




God will hold us all accountable for our sins (Eze.18:30); We should hold each other accountable (Luke.17:3,4);We are Accountable in what we believe(John. 3:17,18,19,God will examine our actions (2Cor.5:10); Armor for physical battles (1Sam. 17:38); Weapons cannot stop God's power ( Eze. 38:4); Spiritual armor prepares us for life (Ro.13:12);Righteousness is a spiritual weapon (2Cor.6:7);God's weapons conquerors Satan's strongholds (2Cor.10:4); Put on the Armor (Eph.6:11-18) Jesus Is the Highest Authority (Matt.28:18) ;Choose a postive attitude (Hab.3:17-19) Bad attitudes hurts our relationship with God (Gen.4:6,7); Bad attitudes leads to poor decisions (Num.14:1-4) ;God gives christian a new attitude (Hab.3:17-19) More Than Conquerors (Ro.8:37)Christians should always rejoice (Phil.4:4) i_amgodschild@yahoo.com.
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Jesus Christ Sees All !!!

Jesus Christ Sees All !!!
Are You in His book Of Life & Death ?

Welcome Home To I_amgodschildcc Place

This is a very warm Welcome To each of You whom came unto this place, i_am godschild cc Home I am glad that you decided to join. I am sure you will find many blessings with us as I am sure you will be a blessing to our family. i_amgodschildcc Home is a Special Room for us to come to for PRAISE and WORSHIP to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, praying for each other, praying for all prayer requests that are shared with us, share testimonies, Bible studies, Christian devotionals, poems, songs and Christian inspirational sites. We are a group of believers dedicated to lifting in prayer the needs that are shared with us, sustain our brethen, Praise the Lord, spread the Wordof God and to reach out to lost and unsaved souls.OFFENSIVE LANGUAGE HAS NO PLACE IN THIS CHRIST CENTERED HOME!!! Because many people has grown up in hearing and /or using offensive language, this is very painful to ALL of us in this home it will NOT be tolerated at ALL!!! If someone post those types of Offensive lanuage you will be deleated Immediately DISMISSED otherwise Banned from this Home of the Lord Jesus Christ it will NOT be tolerated at ALL!!!! There is NO asking for Donations or Money of to Send Money of any kind in Advertising your work. If the Lord wants someone to send money to a person, He will place it upon the heart of someone to do so. It would be appreciated if All people whom come to this site that if You whom come to post here that You would refrain from Gossip or Critizing people here in this home of Jesus Christ for we do Not do any kind of disagreements, nor we Debate it anything in this Home at All!! It will Not, for the Lord say's in His Sword of His Own Word in this manner for all of Us to follow and adhere to: "You brood of snakes ! How could evil men like you speak what is good and right? For whatever is in your heart determines what you say. A good person produces good words from a good heart, and an evil person produces evil words from an evil heart. And I tell You this, that YOU Must give an account on Judgement day of every idle word You speak The Words You say now reflects Your fate then; either You will be justified by them or You will be condemned...[Matt.12:34-36N.L.T.] Feel free to post on the message board as the Holy Spirit leads you. Please share your prayers and be in agreement with other prayers that are shared with us. Let's just lift Holy hands and Praise the Lord today!!

14 Oh, how generous and gracious our Lord was! He filled me with the faith and love that come from Christ Jesus.

15 This is a trustworthy saying, and everyone should accept it: “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners”—and I am the worst of them all. 16 But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life. 17 All honor and glory to God forever and ever! He is the eternal King, the unseen one who never dies; he alone is God. Amen.

1 Timothy 1:14-17 (New Living Translation)

My Prayer for You in each one of you as an individual person and family and friends as well as aquaintances this journey we call life is for All of You!

10 Love each other with genuine affection,[a] and take delight in honoring each other. 11 Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically.[b] 12 Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. 13 When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality.

Romans 12:10-13 (New Living Translation)



My Testimony

Hello Everyone; I thought that I would give this testimony of how things had taken place in my very own life. Some of things has been left out of it. Some of these things You could read between the Lines and to know it in your own heart just as if You had been there taking it all in as one would often time do in these simliar things hurts, habits, and all of those hang - ups as a next person that had gone through it as well themselves.I had often times felt that I had already gone onto as people often times say to whom ever living as if we had already have been in world world 3. I'm only saying this because of me growing as a very small baby I had a Foster Mother in whom I loved so very much for such as I was literally told by her momma from an infant that she wasn't my true Mother that I had a real mother with many siblings living with her and I'd had better get used to it in my life and as in some people very much they had done all the things that any ones own parent could do for them from infancy until almost an adolecent. From the time that I was an only child never did I realize what those truths were until my parents had told Me that I am a foster child that they loved so dearly but they didn't like the way that My real Mother was rasing me and she had kept Me to raised in her undivided "Love" beside being raised where she had loving manner with shown Me just where Her Accountability mattered in her home. Now in my "Real Mother's " home it was so much of a vast differences in her home, and having bad motives and none action that wasn't alot of "Inconsistencies" had gotton Me to where violence and wreckless parents within the family unit and couldn't be myself in that inviroment that for sure was very unstable for my own personal growth. I had thought that those was my parent until one day some cold hard fact and truths came creaping out of my momma. She was stern and I knew what she meant and what she said was gospel.But she loved me just the same for being my foster momma to me. I watched her go through so many trials and heartache in her life and she cried and had been hurt by a husband whom had left us to be with another woman and her already made family. My momma did all those things that a parent could and wanted to do as a mother. She worked and I went to school like any other young child. Of course I acted up badly when I had lived with my precious momma, but I was sort of a mean kid whom had done alot of things that I ought not and should not have done. But the one or perhaps many things about her just made me feel like it was always home to me even til the day she passed away. (Years earlier). She loved me and showed me how to do things in a home, like most momma's do she gave me spankings but it wasn't nothing like my real mother would do. They were so very different as day is to night. My thoughts just never left my momma. You know being with the very brutal side of my real parent will never be forgotton because in the home it was world war 3. It was horrible that at times It just speaks to all of those horable things that had happened to me while living in that place of such high frequencies of motives and in - actions that only a person like me had gone through in a persons own life, of the horrors that went in that place. I later in years found out the real reasons all of those mean actions of the way she was to me and ways she had done alot of things which makes a person like I was so bitterly confused, beaten, raped, and almost killed not only by my real mother but her husband too. I'll never forget what it done to my own soul is like living in hell with fire torching me all of the time, day and night was never a miss.Bu they cursed at me telling me that I was No good and I wasn't going to amount to anything and more cursing came at me like it rolled like a thunder storm in every breath they had taken and couldn't even ask why,I couldn't share my thoughts with them because sure enough I would get it again. They had their parties that lasted into the wee hours in the mornings every weekend with things in the home got broken simly because it would be broken up , fighting, cursing at each other, the windows of the car got broken by a brick being thrown from mother's hand because of those things he had done to her. I knew that I was in hot water again, just because she would run off from being mad at him. I hated those times because I knew what I was in for every time that would happen. Some of my own family member was just like him and did those simliar thing to me.Only 2 of my siblings made so many efforts for me to live with them but to No avil. Everytime I'd get something nice for those holidays it would get ripped into pieces while the other kids got to keep what they had. After a while I really didn't care about anything anymore! They taught me to be just like them and I lost myself ! I just didn't know me anymore.Her hubby used to call me out to his garage filled his brown "Dr. Peppers" glass with his favorite pop as I watched him pour his drink mixed with alcohol, i'm not going to say anything more about that horrible person in that kind of manner. A few of his own family members was just the same. Some of them as well did thing's in like manner for they are sibling that was older than I . I got so tired of those things and after awhile I was like being under a very heavy doeses of anesthesia that I never came out of from being in that place. Everything I had been taught was lost to never return in such a very ugly inside of myself had been ripped apart destroying anything of which I had known about me was gone and I ws No longer there! I left that place and right out in the streets and never looked back at that place again for many of years.I was someone like in Germany that has shared with me simliar virtures that had taken on in my own life from the very start of my street worth had been like in what my husband has shared with me about those brothels that's lined up for many a blocks. It's all I knew how to do and run with the seedy people whom was just like me and thugs,mobsters, thieves. I got caught up with people that most people didn't want to cross over if they wanted to stay alive for the most part, or if they owed a favor yet in turn it wasn't good either.Well drugs, alcohol, kept me up and down for most of those years. I had so many problems that it never gave me a clue. Emotions was high going from one place to another even with scooter people whom I'd hung out at all of those places. For the most part they helped me along my years, then I'd back away and find me another crowd to hang out with, it didn't matter how rich you might of been at the end of those nights I was a shallow of a person whom was there for a time at your expense. Oh, I've have had relationships and marriages even children came out of some. I never thought I'd stop in living like the way I was. It never entered my mind at all, nor would anyone would bring up in helping "self" to see something different in how to stop and detour my life.Oh at times I went back and had seen my momma and she always loved me just like it never ever stopped. I hid alot of things from her that never enterered in our conversations simply I didn't want her to know and thought that she would tell me to leave and never come back to her home again so I kept quiet about it at those times I had been visiting Mom,except to be a good girl.I had lost one child in what had happend in the way I lived my life and some of them from the x's and people whom had tons of money whom ruled the world with an iron fists and towns of which we lived. I couldn't fight it and I lost something that was so precious to me. It had me even tighter and I never knew what to do. But stick my thumb out and hit the trails onward I went back to the home town of which I was born and as it had taken a while while I had been on the road which was full of dangers into the next day . Some of the time that it was fun but today looking back it was the darkest days in my own life. All of those dark nights that was lit from 24 hours lasted more than hours but weeks at a time. I never never ever said that he ever was a person of a father figure to me but as a sperm donor for my mother[Real] is all he had been to me but my real mother life whom loved him and of course had more children between them. So that pretty much how it was back then for me. Until one night and being seperated once again, I had went to someones home and relaxed like I always did with people I knew very well. That night was just a peek of what terrible things that had taken place in my world. And this what some people likes to do to "young ladies or women"I was literally thrown into a car and they had taken me to an abandon house and beat the daylights out of me and raped me and tried to kill me that horrible night that lasted till early morning.For some reason I said a get me out of here prayers, I then saw something liked I'd never ever seen before in my entire life and I've never forgot it till this day. It was a figure liked I've never seen before but the funny part about it it was missing a face while it was there! Oh it white and hands like a real person has on one glossy set of hands and you could see right through it. And a golden crown . Now, that amazed me like never before! Then I saw this figure waving those hands to come this way but it stumped me because I didn't know where those men were in the house. I looked around to see where they were in that place. I wiped away the blood on my face so I could see some what better. As I looked again that person or thing was still waving at me to come unto them. I was frightened and didn't know what to expect! So I just got off that floor and headed out the window and that things or person that I had seen just felt like it guided me to where safety and as they led me then what I then seen was a huge drop to hit the ground. As I did my ankel twisted and I somehow got back straight and ran until I found some help in a apt. building and ran inside. I knocked on door and a another man came to the door and I at once covered myself up and passed out on the floor. Just as You already know where I woke up at and to see just the very fact I was ALIVE! I had lost the court case and to my suprise from what I had found out they did it again to someone much younger than me. That was 2 weeks later after the courts. I went into treatment and left that town simply because my hubby didn't like the fact that I been done by the other race. Man I was so bitterly angry at men so I had turn into a homosexual for a time and when I was in my stupor while drinking I had come to realize what the heck I was doing in a relationship with this woman and I went through tons of help back then and under a shrink for so many years, It was hard but I kept it up after it so I could do what was told to me so I could get better. I went through secular programs and I did so much better and even had a child come back to me, then another one which was a suprise. Even tried to always make things work and had all of those emotions sticking out so very badly. It got so bad that my old self came back to me and I literally stabbed someone . Oh, it finally hit me after one of my very heavy drunks that I really needed some help . I went cold turkey and got off those meds that nearly killed me during that time. Later I moved to another place and tried to do things a little differently. I had my scooter buddies that I had met but this time they we not like those in times past. They began to share me about a man called Jesus in which I had only heard about as a child and never believed! But they shared with me that whole weekend and I found a pastor in that town and began searching for more answers to all of my un - answered questions that they had helped me with in my life. They had a quaint little place which was half restaurant, and church. But I got saved in August 18, 1997. I had met someone and then married him as he had other people round him that I didn't know very well and he had this person move in with us and quite frankly really didn't want him there but between the two to my much suprise another person around whom had made drugs and was selling them I had found about when I saw neddles laying around in different places and I left at the pastors request and on my way out of town he nearly ran me over with his semi-truck in that pouring rain storm but than God and I made it to where I was going. I found my self heading to a hospital early the next morning at my best friends advice. She went to school and if I hadn't been home she knew where to come find me. As it turned out I had died and came back and I knew it was the Lord, My savior whom brought me back. There's more to this story that just blows my mind to this day simply because of that happeneing to me this very day. Oh, Yes I had to re-learn everything over again, just as if I was a very sm. child. I had some long talks with the Lord and cried many tears unto Him only to see for my self that those where trials from Him to see if I ment it or wanted to turn back to the old me.But I didn't thank You Jesus! I kept hanging on like i've never ever did in my life. Some of those people were not nice people at all, they was crude and very abnoxious in all those hateful words and cussing at me, walking all over me just as if I hadn't been standing still. But my precious Jesus and I kept praying and communicating with one another and I went to church and they helped me too. But the cold hard facts is Jesus Christ whom got me through it until this very day. I had sugery this year on memorial day weekend over the stuff that happened to me back then. But You know what ? He always told me that he would never ever forskake me.I know and truly believe it with all my heart today.He is still helping me to learn all the more about Him ... I'm so very thankful unto my precious Jesus for showing me His ways for me to live in and all my cares goes unto Him today.Every time I go though His fires of His many test. One more time he molding me more unto Him to be just as he in the likeness in doing my best in leaving more of me in this old very horrible nasty old world.I left my sins where it all needs to be in His glorious righteousness and it is where it absolutley stays for me and being in the one whom is the almighty God. Now I'm doing my best in Him in leaving old teaching of those religious people behind in still having our close relationship in Him together as I want it more and more in my life forever more til he takes us home to be in that new Jerusalem. I just don't like be a person in what God calls a "stiff necked person" which is incorruptable in front of him. I know that he's destroyed alot of the old me.I know that I still get mixed up at times but He's helping me through it all! Today I get tired so easily and have to rest when my body tells me too My mind often times acts like the "lost child". But that's ok because when I get up... I am with Jesus and helping others the best that I can, My husband and I have opened our home to people whom are in this world today. But after they get through asking questions about our faith, they stop right in those tracks and try to not do what they themselves need to do and try to much and be like the devil himself ! Then we share with each and every one that they need some help at first to get out of those damned up emotions, then try Jesus as they go through it all but they refuse all things and out the door they go. Then the next one apprears and it never has stopped here in our home. We keep sharing the word with them one after another.We too, live on a fixed income that don't help any at all except for the medical. food is very low here at our home, we go to the food pantries, and often times to one family member to have them give us a meal or two. But then we help people out in a church when I can help in sacking up food in bags, and clothing pantries as well. That's how our life is for us as we depend on our heavenly Father And He alway's takes care of us,He's shown us both different kinds of ways that only Him can do in taking care of us, we've seen how the Lord bring us money to pay these bills, and car, and food unto us and protects us through these storms that comes through out town. I can never say enough about our Jesus! At least not so much in words to Him Jesus Christ whom I love very deeply inside of myself and is my King, my Lover , whom rules and judges me when it comes to my own final curtain call for me to Bow down at His feet awaiting my own judgement just as everyone else in this earth it is where it's between he and I only. We truly trust Him[Jesus Christ & the Trinity] in every kind of conditions,situations, trials that comes our way in being in him.I'll lways grow as in time and seasons just like many of You but the potter's wheel as He is going forth in every side that brings up such strong reasons to produce all of my causes, issues,that comes before Himself to represents me in all of my ways as an intercessor for the release to come forth in His own "power & authority in taking me unto His own character daily in being in obedience unto Jesus Christ that continues to draw me until He comes for everyone at a moments notice. The idols are gone and all is left is JESUS today.That my sisters & brothers is the way it is here. I know I didn't mentioned alot of other things but in general You get the message, others that whom truly knows me daily know all of those missing parts of my life. i_a,godschild would like to Thank You for allow in this site,group sites, web sites and other prayer sites as well in holding one another up for prayer's being totally united in everyone around this world, it's about Jesus Christ first and prayers,intecessory prayer's and at other times about this vast world we live in today which this old world as we all know it is slowly departing to be reaching our home in glory and Not missing love ever again and may I alway's growing unto my precious Jesus Christ for He's my lawyer, judge unto this world ends. I will alway's praying and sharing with him in my own heart for everyone in my lif No matter where each of You are in this world that God has made as His people whom stands firm and true without a spot or a wringkle in heading to that one final place called: A New Jerusalem" The Prayer that I had used to bring me out of which I had been in for so very long in my own personal life and may it help anyone whom is out in this world that has come of those simliar things as I had done. Hello Everyone; I thought that I would give this testimony of how things had taken place in my very own life. Some of things has been left out of it. Some of these things You could read between the Lines and to know it in your own heart just as if You had been there taking it all in as one would often time do in these simliar things hurts, habits, and all of those hang - ups as a next person that had gone through it as well themselves.I had often times felt that I had already gone onto as people often times say to whom ever living as if we had already have been in world world 3. I'm only saying this because of me growing as a very small baby I had loved so very much for such as Iand as in some people very much they had done all the things that any ones own parent could do for them from infantcy until almost an adolecent. From the time that I was an only child never did I realize what those truths were until my parents had told Me that I am a foster child that they loved so dearly but they didn't like the way that My real Mother was rasing me and she had kept Me to raised in her undivided "Love" beside being raised where she had loving manner with shown Me just where Her Accountability mattered in her homeand not having bad motives and none action that wasn't been alot of "Inconsistencies" had gotton Me to where violence and wreckless parents within the family unit and couldn't be myself in that inviroment is unstable for your growth. I had thought that those was my parent until one day some cold hard fact and truths came creaping out of my momma. She was stern and i knew what she meant and what she said was gospel.But she loved me just the same for being a foster momma to me. I watched her go through so many trials and heartache in her life and she cried and had been hurt by a husband whom had left us to be with another woman and her already made family. My momma did all those things that a parent could and wanted to do as a mother. She worked and I went to school like any other young child. Of course I acted up badly when I had lived with my precious momma, but I was sort of a mean kid whom had done alot of things that I ought not and should not have done. But the one or perhaps many things about her just made me feel like it was always home to me even til the day she passed away. (Years later). She loved me and showed me how to do things in a home, like most momma's do she gave me spankings but it wasn't nothing like my real mother would do. They were so very different as day is to night. My thoughts just never left my momma. You know being with the very brutal side of my real parent will never be forgotton because in the home it was world war 3.It was horrible that at times I just speak of the horrors that went in that place.I later in years found out the real reasons all of those means and ways she had done alot of things which makes a person like I was so bitterly confused, beaten, raped, and almost killed not only by my real mother but her husband too. I'll never forget what it done to my own soul is like living in hell with fire torching me all of the time, day and night was never a miss.They had thier parties that lasted into the wee hours in the mornings every weekend I knew i was in hot water again, just because she would run off from being mad at him. I hated those times because I knew what I was in for every time that would happen.Some of my own family member was just like him and did those simliar thing to me.Only 2 of my siblings made so many efforts for me to live with them but to No avil.Everytime I'd get something nice for those holidays it would get ripped into pieces while the other kids got to keep what they had.After a while I really didn't care about anything anymore! They taught me to be just like them and I lost myself ! I just didn't know me anymore.Her hubby used to call me out to his garage filled with his favorite pop as I watched him pour his drink mixed with alcohol, i'm not going to say anything more about that horrible person in that kind of manner. A few of his own family members was just the same.Some of them as well did thing's in like manner for they are sibling that was older than I . I got so tired of those things and after awhile I was like being under a very heavy doeses of anesthesia that I never came out of from being in that place. Everything I had been taught was lost to never return in such a very ugly inside of myself had been ripped apart destroying anything of which I had known about me was gone and I No longer there! I left that place and right out in the streets and never looked back at that place again for many of years.I was someone like in Germanythat has shared with me simliar virtures that had taken on in my own life from the very start of my street worth had been likein what my husband has shared with me about those brothels that's lined up for many a blocks. It's all I knew how to do and run with the seedy people whom was just like me and thugs,mobsters. I got caught up with people that most people didn't want to cross over if they wanted to stay alive for the most part, or if they owed a favor yet in turn it wasn't good either.Well drugs, alcohol, kept me up and down for most of those years. I had so many problems that it never gave me a clue. Emotions was high going from one place to another even with scooter people whom hung out at all of those places. For the most part they helped me along my years, then I'd back away and find me another crowd to hang out with, it didn't matter how rich you might of been at the end of those nights I was a shallow of a person whom was there for a time at your expense. Oh, I've have had relationships and marriages even children came out of some. I never thought I'd stop in living like the way I was. It never entered my mind at all, nor would anyone would bring up in helping "self" to see something different in how to stop and detour my life.Oh at times I went back and had seen my momma and she always loved me just like it never ever stopped. I hid alot of things from her that never enterered in our conversations simply I didn't want her to know and thought that she would tell me to leave and never come back to her home again so I kept quiet about it at those times I had been visiting Mom,except to be a good girl.I had lost one child in what had happend in the way I lived my life and some of them from the x's and people whom had tons of money whom ruled the world with an iron fists and towns of which we lived. I couldn't fight it and I lost something that was so precious to me. It had me even tighter and I never knew what to do. But stick my thumb out and hit the trails onward I went back to the home town of which I was born and as it had taken a while while I had been on the road which was full of dangers into the next day . Some aof the time that it was fun but today looking back it was the darkes dayst in my own life. All of those dark nights that was lit from 24 hours lasted more than hours but weeks at a time. I never never ever said that he ever was a person of a father figure tp me but as a sperm donor is all he had been to me but my real mother life whom loved him and of course had more children between them. So that pretty much how it was back then for me. Until one night and being seperated once again, I had went to someone home and relaxed like I always did with people I knew very well. That night was just a peek of what terrible things that had taken place in my world. And this what some people likes to do to "young ladies or women"I was literally thrown into a car and they had taken me to an abandon house and beat the daylights out of me and raped me and tried to kill me that horrible night that lasted till early morning.For some reason I said a get me out of here prayers, I then saw something liked I'd never ever seen before in my entire life and I've never forgot it till this day. It was a figure liked I've never seen before but the funny part about it it was missing a face while it was there! Oh it white and hands like a real person has on one glossy set of hands and you could see right through it. And a golden crown . Now, that amazed me like never before! Then I saw this figure waving those hands to come this way but it stumped me because I didn't know where those men were in the house. I looked around to see where they were in that place. I wiped away the blood on my face so I could see some what better. As I looked again that person or thing was still waving at me to come unto them. I was frightened and didn't know what to expect! So I just got off that floor and headed out the window and that things or person that I had seen just felt like it guided me to where safety and as they led me then what I then seen was a huge drop to hit the ground. As I did my ankel twisted and I somehow got back straight and ran until I found some helpin a apt. building and ran inside. I knocked on door and a another man came to the door and I at once covered myself up and passed out on the floor. Just as You already know where I woke up at and to see just the very fact I was ALIVE! I had lost the court case and to my suprise from what I had found out they did it again to someone much younger than me. That was 2 weeks later after the courts. I went into treatment and left that town simply because my hubby didn't like the fact that I been done by the other race. I went through tons of help back then and under a shrink for so many years, It was hard but I kept after it so I could do what was told to me so I could get better. I went through secular programs and I did so much better and even had a child come back to me, then another one which was a suprise. Even tried to always make things work and had all of those emotions sticking out so very badly. It got so bad that my old self came back to me and I literally stabbed someone . Oh, it finally hit me after one of my very heavy drunks that I really needed some help . I went cold turkey and got off those meds that nearly killed me during that time. Later I moved to another place and tried to do things a little differently. I had my scooter buddies that I had met but this time they we not like those in times past. They began to share me about a man called Jesus in which I had only heard about as a child and never believed! But they shared with me that whole weekend and I found a pastor in that town and began searching for more. They had a quaint little place which was half resturant, and church. But I got saved that year of 1997. I had met someone and then married him as he had other people round him that I didn't know very well and he had this person move in with us and quite frankly really didn't want him there but between the two to my much suprise another person around whom had made drugs and was selling themI had found about when I saw Neddles laying around in different places and I left at the pastors request and on my way out of town he nearly ran me over with his semi-truck in that pouring rain storm but than God I made it to where I was going. I found my self heading to a hospital early the next morning at my best friends advice. She went to school and if I hadn't been home she knew where to come find me. As it turned out I had died and came back and I knew it was the Lord, My savior whom brought me back. There's more to this story that just blows my mind to this day simply because of that happeneing to me this very day. Oh, Yes I had to re-learn everything over again, just as if I was a very sm. child. I had some long talks with the Lord and cried many tears unto Him only to see for my self that those where trials from Him to see if I ment it or wanted to turn back to the old me.But I didn't thank You Jesus! I kept hanging on like i've never ever did in my life. Some of those people were not nice people at all, they was crude and very abnoxious in all those hateful words and cussing at me, walking all over me just as if I hadn't been standing still.But my precious Jesus and I kept praying and communicating with one another and I went to church and they helped me too. But the cold hard facts is Jesus Christ whom got me through it until this very day. I had sugery this year on memorial day weekend over the stuff that happened to me back then. But You know what ? He always told me that he would never ever forskake me.I know and truly believe it with all my heart today.He is still helping me to learn all the more about Him ... I'm so very thankful unto my precious Jesus for showing me His ways for me to live in and all my cares goes unto Him today.Every time I go though His fires of His many test. One more time he molding me more unto Him to be just as he in the likeness in doing my best in leaving more of me in this old very horrible nasty old world.I left my sins where it all needs to be in His glorious righteousness and it is where it absolutley stays for me and being in the one whom is the almighty God. Now I'm doing my best in Him in leaving old teaching of those religious people behind in still having our close relationship in Him together as I want it more and more in my life forever more til he takes us home to be in that new Jerusalem. I just don't like still be a person in what God calls a "stiff necked person" which is incorruptable in front of him. I know that he's destroyed alot of the old me.I know that I still get mixed up at times but He's helping me through it all! Today I get tired so easily and have to rest when my body tells me too My mind often times acts like the "lost child". But that's ok because when I get up... I am with Jesus and helping others the best that I can, My husband and I have opened our home to people whom are in this world today. But after they get through asking questions about our faith, they stop right in those tracks and try to not do what they themselves need to do and try to much and be like the devil himself ! Then we share with each and every one that they need some help at first to get out of those damned up emotions, then try Jesus as they go through it all but they refuse all things and out the door they go. Then the next one apprears and it never has stopped here in our home. We keep sharing the word with them one after another.We too, live on a fixed income that don't help any at all except for the medical. food is very low here at our home, we go to the food pantries, and often times to one family member to have them give us a meal or two. But then we help people out in a church when I can help in sacking up food in bags, and clothing pantries as well. That's how our life is for us as we depend on our heavenly Father And He alway's takes care of us,He's shown us both different kinds of way that only Him can do in taking care of us, we've seen how the Lord bring us money to pay these bills, and car, and food unto us and protects us through these storms that comes through out town. I can never say enough about our Jesus! At least not so much in words as it is in tounges is where it's between he and I only. We truly trust Him[Jesus Christ & the Trinity] in every kind of conditions,situations, trials that comes our way in being in him.I'll lways grow as in time and seasons just like many of You but the potter hs His wheel as He is going forth in every side that brings up such strong reasons to produce all of my causes, issues,that comes before Himself to represents me in all of my ways as an intercessor for the release to come forth in His own "power & authority in taking me unto His own character daily in being in obedience unto Jesus Christ that continues to draw me until He comes for everyone at a moments notice. The idols are gone and all is left is JESUS today.That my sisters & brothers is the way it is here. I know I didn't mentioned alot of other things but in general You get the message, others that know me daily know all of those missing parts of my life. i_a,godschild would like to Thank You for allow in this site,group sites, web sites and other prayer sites as well in holding one another up for prayer's being totally united in everyone around this world, it's about Jesus Christ first and prayers,intecessory prayer's and at other times about this vast world we live in today which this old world as we all know it is slowly departing to be reaching our home in glory and Not missing love ever again and may I alway's growing unto my precious Jesus Christ for He's my lawyer, judge unto this world ends. I will alway's praying and sharing with him in my own heart for everyone in my life No matter where each of You are in this world that God has made as His people whom stands firm and true without a spot or a wringkle in heading to that one final place called: A New Jerusalem" Prayer: Father, I loose any stronghold in my life protecting wrong feelings I have against anyone. Forgive me as I forgive those who have caused me pain, loss or grief. I loose any desire for retribution or to rectify. In the name of Jesus, I loose the power and effects of any harsh or hard words (word curses) spoken about me, to me or by me. I loose any strongholds connected with them. I loose all generational bondages and their stronghold from myself. I thank you Jesus that you have promised whatsoever I bind and loose on earth will be bound and loosed in heaven. In Jesus name, I loose the grave clothes from my soul. I loose any generational bondage from my soul. I loose any opposition and resistance from my soul and I loose any hidden agendas from my soul. I loose, shatter, and destroy the layer of self-control and self-defense, that I have allowed my soul to put down over my unmet needs, my unhealed hurts, and my unresolved issues. Father, some of them have been there for so long, and I have believed they would never be fixed. Forgive me, Father, for believing this, help me to work with You to loose layer after layer myself, so that these layers of vulnerability can be exposed to Your healing grace.I loose the grave clothes from my soul. I loose any generational bondage from my soul. I loose any opposition and resistance from my soul and I loose any hidden agendas from my soul. I loose, shatter, and destroy the layer of self-control and self-defense, that I have allowed my soul to put down over my unmet needs, my unhealed hurts, and my unresolved issues. Father, some of them have been there for so long, and I have believed they would never be fixed. Forgive me, Father, for believing this, help me to work with You to loose layer after layer myself, so that these layers of vulnerability can be exposed to Your healing grace. Thank You for reading this and may You be blessed alway's and forever. Amen. i_amgodschild. . Thank You for reading this and may You be blessed alway's and forever. Amen. i_amgodschild. .

How Are You Dealing with Cancer with some one in your life?